Who is recording this children's music? And why?

One of the things my daughter enjoys is listening to CD's while we drive.  My car doesn't have a DVD player in it (I know, the humanity), but I've never found that to be an issue as she has always been perfectly content listening to her music.  Her father and myself, we miss our music.  But we tolerate hers because she enjoys it.  Some of it is even kind of good.  A lot of it, however, is just down right disturbing.

The Mister came to me the other day with this proclamation:  "I am thinking about throwing out that CD we've been listening to with The Nugget.  It has come to my attention that no less than five animals, maybe six, lose their lives during the course of CD."

I can't disagree with him here.  Dying animals doesn't seem like such an awesome theme for children.  I mean, yes, animals and all living things do eventually die.  I'm just not sure that's a topic I want to explore with my child on the way to, say, the zoo or her grandparents' house.

One of the songs which was in The Mister's line of fire is a song about some pigs who "go oink, oink, oink".  Evidently the author of this song feels pretty strongly that the pigs "ought to go wee, wee, wee, wee."  So strongly, in fact, that said oinking pigs end up dead as a result of their refusal to stop their oinking and join in the weeing.  It is my (admittedly rudimentary) understanding that a pig's natural instinct is to oink.  It goes against their nature to say wee.  I am aware that in the "This Little Piggy" game a pig does, in fact, say "wee wee wee all the way home", however, I am going to go ahead and call this an exception to the rule.  My point being, why are we killing pigs for displaying their own natural behavior?

And while we're on this topic, just because you have a sweetly voiced adult or a child singing something, that doesn't make it children's music.  I am confused as to how the song "Darling Clementine" has worked it's way into this genre.  Has anyone ever listened to the words?  SHE'S DEAD, PEOPLE!  I mean, yes, it's a love song, but it's a mournful love song about how Clementine drowned and he is unable to save her.  Is this really the kind of mood we want our kids steeped in?  If I decide to record a CD of children singing songs like Metallica's "Enter Sandman" and Marilyn Manson's "Sweet Tooth", does that make it children's music or just really freaking creepy?  Are we just going by the titles here, or what?

I guess we're just lucky that we dropped the practice of playing music for The Nugget before she fell asleep when she was only a couple of months old.  I can only imagine if she were falling asleep to some of this stuff.  I feel scared just thinking about it!  I am sure we would be waking to screams over dead pigs and drowning women.

I suppose the people we really ought to be mad at are the recording studios or record executives who release this music.  After all, artists are often known to be limit-pushers and the population is general is filled with the mentally ill and perverse.  So I have to blame the gate holders for not barring the door a little more tightly to those who would ask for access to our children. 

I would be remiss, as well, if I didn't accept some responsibility as a consumer.  I can shirk some off on the fact that nearly all of our children's CD's were gifts.  I can also say that, based on the fact that they were CHILDREN'S CD's, I thought they would be okay.  Finally, the fact that songs about murder and mayhem are sandwhiched between classics such as "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" and "I'm a Little Teapot" does not exempt me from my basic parental role as protector of my child.  The fact that I assumed based on titles alone that the songs would be appropriate for my two year old does nothing but, as the saying goes, make an ass out of u and me.  Or mainly me.

Anyway way you put it, I see no alternative other than to come up with a complicated rating system for all children's music.  I will form a coalition!  The coalition will petition congress!  We will take back our children's innocence one song at a time!

Or maybe I'll just hit fast forward.


  1. Most children's music annoys me. I make mine listen to country. :)

  2. Remind me to play the "Beaver" song that is on a CD we got from Ava's teacher when she was in the toddler room. While the beat is catchy, violence isn't the only thing being covered in "kids" songs! I guess it can be my excuse for letting her listen to ACDC's Thunderstruck on my tailgaiting CD. She thinks that's about weather! Lol! Xo

  3. To quote Nick Hornby, "Did I listen to pop music because I was depressed, or was I depressed because I listened to pop music?"

  4. I don't mind The Wiggles, but the boys don't care for it anymore.

    Of course, I have teenagers too so any children's music is better than Eminem.

  5. We didn't have a CD, cassette or 8-track player in our car when I was a kid, so we just sang endless verses of "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall." We turned out ok. I think.

  6. Pigs don't go wee. Everything goes wee.

  7. I hear you. And I'm disturbed by Puff the Magic Dragon. It's depressing.

    Have you seen the Rockabye Lullaby series? They are all instrumental lullabies, but we have things like Sunday Bloody Sunday. I'm cool with it because there aren't words.

    In general, though, I'm with you--why all this death? It's weird.

  8. I do a 50/50 split of my radio choices (which at times do have to be filtered) and their kid music. I've narrowed down their choices to the CD's made with their names in them and some CDs we got from their preschool.

    All of their songs bother me, but I don't think any of them are disturbing. Now that you bring this topic up though I'm going to have to listen more closely. Maybe I've been singing along to one of the more sinister lyrics set to a melodious tune. :)

  9. I'm not blessed with children, but when I visit my sisters and niece and friend - all of which do have children - I am overwhelmed by the children's TV and music videos. Not in a good way either ;D

    I'm here from the link-up

    I wanted to share with you that there's a new writing challenge/linky in town. Every weekend I'll share a PROMPT and every Wednesday everyone can link up there (poem or short story 500 max) response at the Storyteller Linky. This week’s prompt is a Picture. Check it out. :)
    I also have a spooky book review and the weekend blog hop right now too! http://wordsinsync.blogspot.com/2011/10/halloween-book-review-voice-of-blood-by.html
    Love to have you on bored, but have a great weekend either way. Shah .X

  10. I always enjoyed the tune of "Darling Clementine," and I knew that she was "lost and gone forever," but I guess I just liked the song. It was hammered in my head as a youngster.

    My kids are in their early 20s and late teens, and I am still listening to their music. I feel that it does keep me in touch with the latest trends!

    Nice post!

  11. We've gotten our boys hooked on Snacktime by the Bare Naked Ladies (called BNL on the CD). They love it. And we love The Jimmies, another kid friendly group. Both the Jimmies and BNL play music that sounds grown up but the lyrics are silly and nonsensical for kids. It keeps us all sane on long trips!

    The Clementine song was a favourite growing up. I played it once for the boys but they didn't get the draw. Oh well!

  12. Can I just say "yes" what you said. A close friend is an elementary music teacher and she sometimes sends me awesome kids' music, otherwise, it kind of sucks.

  13. Mel- Are you not updating this site anymore? I keep clicking over and only getting to this post.


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